As humans, we make mistakes—and as first-time dads, we make even more mistakes.
It’s all part of the journey.
To help make your new dad’s life a little smoother, I’ve rounded up common missteps (and some hilarious confessions) from fellow dads.
One dad shared that his biggest mistake was showing off his Mickey Mouse impression, only to have his daughter demand it for everything—feeding, bedtime, you name it.
The moral of the story: some talents are best kept secret.
Here are 8 more mistakes new dads make—and how you can steer clear of them.
Photo by OPPO Find X5 Pro on Unsplash
1. Buying Too Much Stuff
It’s easy to get carried away.
You walk into a baby store, and everything screams “You NEED this to be a good dad!”
Before you know it, you’ve got a cart full of baby shoes (for someone who can’t walk yet), a bottle warmer, and three strollers—one for jogging, one for the car, and one for “just in case”.
You don’t need all that.
Here’s the reality: babies need clothes, diapers, wipes, and a comfortable place to sleep.
That’s it. Most of the other stuff is just convenience or marketing magic.
Start with the basics, and if you find you need something later, you can always add it.
2. Not Accepting Help
You want to be Superdad. I get it.
But here’s the truth—parenting is not a solo mission.
When people offer to help, it’s not because they think you’re incapable.
It’s because they’ve been there, and they know how overwhelming it can be.
Take the help.
Let Grandma cook dinner, or ask your best friend to watch your baby while you’re eating.
Even just having someone hold the baby while you shower can feel like a luxury.
Trust me, people understand and will be happy if they can help you too.
3. Struggling with Empathy
Understanding your partner’s experience isn’t exactly easy.
You didn’t carry a baby for nine months, endure sleepless nights during pregnancy, or, you know, push a human out of your body.
But that doesn’t mean you can’t make an effort to be empathetic.
I’ll admit, I am the “fix-it” guy. If my wife said, “My back hurts,” my first instinct was to offer solutions, like, “You should’ve stretched more.”
But think about it, that’s not what she needed.
Over time, I realized it’s less about fixing and more about listening.
So, instead of jumping in with advice, try saying, “Oh no, that sounds rough—can I grab you a pillow or do anything to help?”
It’s a small gesture, but it shows you’re paying attention and that you care.
Practicing empathy strengthens your relationship and helps you feel like a real team.
4. Expecting Instant Bonding
Expecting to bond with your baby immediately is a common expectation many first-time dads have, but it’s not always realistic.
Unlike moms, who often develop a connection over the nine months of pregnancy, dads don’t have the same daily physical reminders of what’s coming.
It’s natural to feel out of place at first, especially when you’re left alone with a crying baby.
I remember when my son was seven months old; I often felt clueless about what to do when my wife wasn’t around, and I would just switch to “autopilot” when she was.
If you’ve felt the same way, know that it’s perfectly normal.
Bonding takes time, and it grows as you spend consistent, quality time with your baby—whether it’s feeding, playing, or even just holding them.
Keep at it, and the connection will come naturally with practice and patience.
5. Comparing Your Baby
“Is your baby crawling yet? Oh, mine started at 6 months!”
Sound familiar?
As dads, we love to compare. It starts with height and weight percentiles and snowballs into milestones, abilities, and eventually, how good they are at sports or school.
Stop.
Every child develops at their own pace.
Comparing your baby to others just sets you up for unnecessary worry.
Celebrate your kids for who they are, not who you think they should be.
If you genuinely think something’s off, talk to your pediatrician—not your coworker Joe who suddenly thinks they’re an expert.
6. Not Helping Enough
Sometimes dads fall into the trap of thinking,
“Well, I’m the provider and she’s the caregiver,” or “I work full-time, so I’m off the hook when I get home.”
Buddy, it’s not babysitting—it’s parenting.
Saying otherwise makes it sound like you’re just filling in for Mom.
You’re not a backup.
You’re a co-parent.
Be proud of your role, whether it’s changing diapers, doing bath time, or soothing a screaming baby at 3 a.m.
The more involved you are, the better it is for your kids—and your relationship with your partner.
7. Not Taking Care of Yourself
Life as a dad can feel like a nonstop relay—juggling work, prepping meals, doing laundry, and trying to keep the household running.
It’s a lot.
Make time for self-care, whether it’s hitting the gym, catching up on a hobby, or even just sitting quietly with a cup of coffee.
Taking care of yourself doesn’t make you selfish; it makes you a better dad and partner.
8. Lack of Communication
When you’re exhausted, communication can feel like a chore, but it’s absolutely essential.
Talk openly with your partner about your feelings, concerns, and needs.
Parenting is hard enough without misunderstandings or unspoken frustrations.